Your guiding light

Mentoring 101: In transitioning to adulthood, young persons often find themselves re-examining their earlier beliefs and assumptions. Accepting responsibility is never a comfortable feeling. Having a mentor can help!

A great combination.

To mentor is to serve as a wise and trusted counselor to someone less experienced. Mentors help you solve problems that don’t have simple answers. They help you choose wisely when making formative life decisions. They can advance your career, enhance your education, and guide your personal conduct. Indeed, they can help change your life!

The mentor: Ordinarily several years older, the mentor has greater knowledge and experience in an area of personal or professional life that is important to the mentee. He or she is a tribal elder—a parent, teacher, sponsor, adviser, supporter, older friend or co-worker, confidant, and/or a role model. Mentors serve without regard for personal gain.
The mentee: Also called the protégé, the mentee is the student of a mentor. As a novice in the ways of the mentor’s world, the mentee stands to benefit from the mentor’s guidance and advice (see: Ask, and you shall receive). The mentee sets the agenda.
The Mento: A scrumptious candy that is fun to drop in your friend’s Coke (har-har).

The right stuff.

Athletes, politicians, and religious leaders benefit from mentor relationships, as do craftsman and artists. In many occupational settings, mentoring helps employees grow, advance their careers, and build their networks. A study by Sun Microsystems (2009) calculated their return on investment (ROI) from mentoring to be 1,000 percent or greater.

Mentors are also important to personal development. Big Brothers Big Sisters of America, for example, helps “at risk” students reach their potential through one-to-one relationships with mentors. Mentors support young college students, challenging them to take the more difficult steps of evaluating and re-evaluating their thought processes.

Misconceptions about mentoring.

In Mentoring: How to Find a Mentor and How to Become One, author Bobb Biehl discusses some misconceptions about the mentoring process. Five of these misconceptions, adapted to the unique perspectives of Generation NeXt, include:

Mentors are at least 83 years old. Many young persons assume that you have to be very old to be mature enough to be a mentor. This is simply not the case! Some young persons are wise beyond their years. Similarly, some older people are as ditsy as when they were 16. When selecting a mentor, concentrate on finding a person that has had the requisite life experiences and temperament for you. As a rule of thumb, try to find someone 30 years of age or older.
Mentors have all the answers. Overall, Gen NeXters tend to be very skeptical. They question the veracity of information and have a tendency to de-legitimize traditional sources of knowledge. Mentors are not perfect, and they don’t need to be. But young persons do expect them to be honest; they can sense a dilettante a mile away.
Mentors have a script. The mentoring process is unique to each mentee. Learning isn’t “pre-packaged”—it’s based on the mentee’s priorities, questions, and needs. The common denominator is being dedicated to the relationship. As trust evolves, mentees find they are able to ask questions they would never feel comfortable asking others.
Mentees are held to account. Mentoring isn’t a power game. The principal focus is supporting, strengthening, and encouraging the mentee. The mentor is in a unique position to demonstrate the importance of being accountable and can help the young person develop this notion into a force of habit.
Mentoring is the same as coaching. It isn’t. Mentoring is the process of using a specially selected individual to provide broad guidance, support, and advice. In contrast, coaching generally has a short-term duration, such as a sports season or a college course. It tends to be impartial, with the emphasis on performance in a specific area in need of improvement. Achieving a goal for reducing weight or getting a high SAT score would be good tasks where a coach might be helpful.

Although it requires a substantial commitment of time and effort, if honestly pursued, the magic of mentoring can make a big difference in the lives of both mentor and mentee. Good relationships can last for a long time. Young person’s alert: while the mentor provides wisdom and expertise, ultimately you cut your own slice of the pie.

Um, got Mentos?